Sunday, January 4, 2015

New Year's Revelations

In lieu of making any New Year's resolutions, because I'm way too hipster and cool to be mainstream like that, I will be making several New Year's Revelations throughout the year, from my couch. The first step is admitting you have a problem right? I'm so good at it, I've already made a couple and we are only like 2 days into 2015.

My first NYR came to me while I was playing Candy Crush, I thought to myself, "I should be more social." As I grow older, I find myself becoming more and more content with not doing anything or talking to anyone. Sometimes I get a message and I'm like, "Heehhhhhhhhhh," that's the noise I make when I sigh, "Heehhhhhh. Shit. I should type something back." When you get so lazy that texting seems like work, you have issues. It's fingertips and brains, maybe not even fingertips, for fox sake we have talk to text, WE HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY! I don't even give good excuses anymore, my sister will call and ask me to do stuff and I say, "No." "Why not?" "I have no reason, just no." I know what you're thinking, but Rachel, you are so lazy, how will you ever accomplish a feat like that? We bought a new table with our Christmas money (Shout out to my G-ma!) so we will be moving our old one down to the basement, which we recently had to clean because there is a slow leak from the water main and at some point we plan on calling a plumber, but as I have already stated we are very, very lazy. Our basement is slowly turning into some prime real estate for activities, which I plan on utilizing for such. I'll probably even invite people over to partake in said activities. They will have to pee in the floor drain though, I'm not cleaning the rest of my house just some good time freeloaders can use my bathroom for no charge.

Another one of my NYRs sprouted to mind a couple days before the first of the year. "I need to stop biting my nails." This one. I have been biting my nails for as long as I can remember. When I'm anxious, mad, bored, content, fidgety, awake, doesn't matter. I've had customers at my work say things like "HOLY SHINIKES! YOUR NAILS!" Yeah I duckin know, leave me alone you freak. Quit looking at me. Nothing like having your one, lone, single imperfection pointed out by a complete stranger. So now I guess I'm going to try to be proactive and stop biting my nails. I'm on day...4. JESUS IT'S ONLY BEEN FOUR DAYS?! Lawd. This is going to be the longest rest of my life ever... Also if you read this and see me with my hands in my mouth, I'm probably not actually biting my nails, I'm probably just being weird. So don't say anything to me about it, just make a frowny face at me and I'll get it. Or if I'm picking at my nails. One step at a time.

"I should blog more." This one is a given. I'm going to attempt one a week oorrr every two weeks. It's hard because sometimes interesting things don't happen to me and I can't think of anything to write about. I suppose I can always just post pictures of my rabbit dressed up in various period costumery. It would probably get expensive with all the fancy ruff collars.

Good luck everyone with your New Year's Resolutions, if you choose to make any. I won't judge you if you don't.


No comments:

Post a Comment